Still Tired

Friday was another struggle to get up and I didn’t take a Zoloft, but after taking a 2.5 mg valium and waking up at 5, I took another 2.5 valium and 2 trazadones.  I did get back to sleep and didn’t get up till 9:30 but I couldn’t stay up long.  I read more of Matthew, three more Merton essays, and did my knee exercises, but really didn’t get up until after 3.  I did a lot of thinking about my relationship to God (and a lot of praying) but I still uncertain about things.   I am not sure if it is the effects of the reduction in prednisone (from 20 to 17 and ½), the withdrawal from the Zoloft or just the extra drugs I took to go back to sleep, but I need to get my energy back.  I did drive to the Tech Library (to charge my computer and to put in more quotes from Barron and Merton) and stayed about an hour and then I headed to McDonalds to email Jen and Joseph, and to do my blog.  I am hoping to go bike riding a little later and get home in time for evening prayers and songs.    Last night I called Judy to talk about my spiritual progress and she was very caring and told me a lot about how she became a good Catholic (she really is a holy person and I can’t believe how I missed that).  She advised going slowly and that I am on a good path and that gave me some comfort.   Joseph from the Holy Spirit group sent me a very supportive email and I responded so he would understand my situation a little better.  He thinks I am on a good path also, with my readings and my attendance at mass, reconciliation and communion.