The roller coaster continues

      Sunday I had my usual hard time getting up but I read some and eventually did my knee exercises and decided to take a walk down to the first resting stump.  I said the Hail Mary all the way down, a sort of nature rosary and I think the repetition was helpful.  On the way back (without stopping), I chanted the words from “The Chaplet of Divine Mercy,”  “For the sake of the sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on all of the world.”  That was comforting, letting me stay focused on prayer and on Jesus.

      I also got back into writing and I think I wrote some decent things about when I was diagnosed with cancer.  I think that was a time in my relationship with Tracy that we were closest and that seems a better place to focus on instead of the opening I worked on when she first left.

       Things changed rapidly after I headed out of the hollow.  I got a message from Darbi that Laura and David had another counteroffer, this time the fire sale figure of 165K.  I could have rejected that offer but Dougie had only talked about a 180K figure and that was not a committed figure and he would still have to obtain a right of way from Sisson and Ryan.  This would mean I have to pay off 13K on the equity line plus another 25K or so for the rest of the closing expenses.  I had the 50K in my AXA account but I can’t get to that for at least 10 days and the closing was to be by the 19^th, only a week away.  So I called Dave, Rob, John and even Tracy.  She had heard of the problems from Jim Shortt and was pretty friendly, had no money to help me with, but when I asked her to forgive me for how I treated her (which is still the bad behavior that haunts me most), she said she had forgiven me years ago, and that gave me a lot of comfort in my new Catholic mode of repentence.  She asked about my health and I gave her an update.  Finally I got through to Rob and he said he could get me the money tomorrow so that will at least solve that problem.   I didn’t head home to do my prayers but I did end up riding my bike for 40 minutes on the Tech Campus. 

      On Monday I got up at about 7:20, washed and dressed and headed to Union.  I got there at 8:30 (they open at 9:00) but I called and they told me that I could do the deal by making up the difference in the balance.  I was so glad about that.   After a nice bike ride, I ended up going to the 7 pm Mass and Holy Spirit group at St. Mary’s.  That was comforting and then I drove home and cooked dinner and did my weights and yoga.

Tuesday I got up and cut the grass, leaving my truck at my gate and walking up.  After that I did my knee exercises, and then played some piano and headed off to meet Cathy for lunch at Panera in Blacksburg.  We  had a long chat about Maddie, Claire and Lou and about how she was feeling about the girls heading off to Winston Salem.  It was very nice to see her and I explained the situation with the hollow and my possibilities of foreclosure or bankruptcy.   I did go look at the Jefferson Street Apartments but there are 8 stairs to get to all of the units, no washers and dryers in the unit, and I would have to drive to go biking.   Stoubles has no steps, washer dryer inside, and the Huckleberry trail is a few hundred yards away.  It is more expensive but it is a much prettier area and has a lot more positives including the parking situation.  I have to decide on Stoubles by the 20^th, just one more stress.

     Interestingly, at 4:25 I get a call from Darbi, that the closing will be at 10 on Thursday at the fire sale price of 165K so that means I will lose 55K which will really makes things tight till January.   That was wonderful news but I should have realized that I am not off the roller coaster yet.  I rode my bike at Tech and then headed home for my porch ritual but it was hard to concentrate thinking about the closing.

Wednesday has proven the roller coaster ride has not ended.  There were problems with faxing the final payoff figure (finally Lisa emailed it).  During this I had my meeting with Jen and we went over Luke Chapter 2 and she said a lot of interesting things and got me thinking a lot.  She thinks my urgency to connect with the Holy Spirit is way ahead of my pursuit and I think she is right.   I am so glad to have her support and guidance at this very difficult period.  After she left I called Jim Shortt, and he said that there would be no closing tomorrow since he is going to send someone to the courthouse to explore some new material about the history of the railroad crossing.  If they find something he thought Laura and David should go back to the 220 figure but I told him I doubted that would happen although it would be great if they at least raised it to the 180K equity line figure. I just don’t want them to back out of the deal.   It was too late to cancel my room at the Quality Inn (I didn’t want to take a chance on being in the hollow since a downed tree or a flat tire would make me miss the closing) so I am going to head over there soon.  I did do a 40 minute bike ride along the river here in Radford and that helped calm me a bit.